I said we must conquer Iraq
Before they could launch an attack.
It wasn’t an error
To link them to terror,
It justified hitting them back.
In a war you can’t stop and think twice,
Or your countrymen will pay the price.
To avoid any gaffe
I consulted my staff:
Cheney, Wolfowitz, Rummy and Rice.
Of course, Colin’s also my man,
Which is why we sent him to Iran.
But I haven’t the patience
With all of these wars we must plan.
We know the American dream
That this country’s the number one team.
We’ll smash any bully
Before they can fully
Come up with some gross evil scheme.
Our military is first class,
With intelligence none can surpass.
If there’s any upheaval
The axis of evil
Should know that we’ll come kick their … uh, backsides.