Limerick of the Day #105

To protest the Islamic extreme,
Terry Jones has a true harebrained scheme:
For by burning Korans
He'll help al Queda's plans,
Or at least that is how it will seem.

Limerick of the Day #104

With the combat phase technically ended
The state of Iraq's hardly splendid.
Unilateralism's
Engendered more schisms
Than allies and nations befriended.

Limerick of the Day #103

As the combat phase ends in Iraq,
And the U.S. troops start to come back,
You might think it hypocrisy
To count on bureaucracy
To delay each terror attack.

Limerick of the Day #102

The Independence Declaration
Sets forth principles to guide our nation.
Attempts to disparage
The single-sex marriage
Are just one form of discrimination.

Limerick of the Day #101

Play Audio

If the Supreme Court has its own way
Then it will not be long till the day
Elections that were clean
'Ere the Court intervened
Will instead just be sold on eBay.

Limerick of the Day #100

Play Audio

Though it's never experienced calm, Is-
rael was to be the land of promise.
"Get the hell out of Palestine"
Spoke press corps' 89-
year-old former dean, Ms. Helen Thomas.

Limerick of the Day #99

Play Audio

An Israeli force meets an object
And attacks, or boards just to inspect,
Either way, there's such tension
We don't need to mention
That all accounts are incorrect.

Limerick of the Day #98

Audio

While our Gulf coastal beaches get spoiled,
And the wildlife there becomes soiled,
Ask our own MMS
"Drilling?" and they'll say "Yes!"
Perhaps their palms are what's been well oiled.

Copyrights

Peter Davis owns the rights
To these rhymes and renditions.
You may not copy any bytes
Without express permissions.

These may not be distributed
Or copied in whole or part,
Even if duly attributed
To the guy who made this art.

By this time you will have observed,
If you’re at all astute,
That all the rights have been reserved,
Subject to infringement suit.

Limerick of the Day #97

Audio

The world was a feast for the senses
Till we built all our factories and fences.
We just take what we want,
As if earth were a font
Of resources with no consequences.

Limerick of the Day #96

Audio

In primary votes yesterday,
The Tea Party had its first say:
"Round up the incumbs
And throw out the bums.
Our platform is nothin' but Nay."

Limerick of the Day #95

Audio

We worry too much about terror.
In the words of satirist Tom Lehrer:
"Universal bereavement,
An inspiring achievement"
Not from nukes, but plain old human error.

Limerick of the Day #94

Audio

The folks who would drill everywhere
Claim that oil spill disasters are rare.
The equipment all works.
The problem's the jerks
Who design, maintain and repair.

Limerick of the Day #93

Audio

Far worse than a killer or raper
Is the thief who steals toilet paper.
Most dispensers are locked
So that they'll remain stocked,
Not supplying some terrorist caper.

Limerick of the Day #92

Audio

While air travel is typically dull
This week Europeans had a lull.
They're concerned planes might crash
If they fly through the ash
Spewing from Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull.

Limerick of the Day #91

Audio

My computer has kept me up late.
When it's busy, I just have to wait.
This machine never heeds
Computational needs
While installing a software update.

Limerick of the Day #90

Audio

The people who operate mines
Are accustomed to paying out fines
For safety offenses.
They're just more expenses
To come off of their bottom lines.

Limerick of the Day #89

Audio

This blog has been sadly neglected.
It's high time it was resurrected.
I'll try to write more
Of what readers look for,
So you both can find what you expected.

Limerick of the Day #88

Audio

So poetry month starts today,
Which is ironic in an odd way
For there's really no rhyme
For "April", "poetry" or "month".
So why couldn't they do it in May?

Limerick of the Day #87

Audio

There's no more appropriate way
To celebrate St. Patrick's Day
Then to hail Limerick County
For lyrical bounty,
And really there's naught else to say.

Limerick of the Day #86

Audio

Past the dreams of the average civilian,
Who'd be happy with one or two million,
Poor Bill Gates had to switch
To world's second most rich
With a mere fifty-three-point-five billion.

Limerick of the Day #85

Audio

Inner cities are crawling with hoods.
Trade imbalance has stymied our goods.
Health care reform's been blocked.
The Congress is gridlocked.
But who cares? What's up with Tiger Woods?

Limerick of the Day #84

Audio

Here's a motto conservatives keep:
"As you sow, that is how you shall reap."
But we live less on merit
Than what we inherit,
So it's more: "Finders keep, losers weep."

Limerick of the Day #83

Audio

Every poor, defenseless corporation
Had no say in governing our nation.
So the U.S. Supremes
Helped fulfill all their dreams
Of unlimited sponsored oration.

Limerick of the Day #82

Audio

With the world in the mess that it's in,
And our politics governed by spin,
One strong dissident voice
Gave us another choice.
So farewell, Howard Zinn.

Limerick of the Day #81

Audio

Two well-known leaders each gave a speech.
Millions paid close attention to each.
Steve Jobs grabbed all the drama
But "More jobs." pledged Obama.
So which of them has greater reach?

Limerick of the Day #80

Audio

Massachusetts may never live down
The election of Senator Brown,
Whose only platform
Was "Kill Health Care Reform,
And see Kennedy's legacy drown."

Limerick of the Day #79

Audio

In April, Nineteen sixty-eight, a D...
octor King was assassinated.
Now Obama, it seems,
fulfills some of King's dreams,
And he's only four decades belated.

Limerick of the Day #78

Audio

In Google's and Apple's mad dash
To sell ad space on smart phones for cash
They forget how annoying
The tricks they're employing
Can ... wait! Please install the new Flash.